The Best Aussie Joke ever: Laughing for sure!
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- Aussie Joke (engl.)
One night in a park in Darwin, having a cold beer and enjoying life, a #true Aussie' said: „Record this joke and spread it all over the world, so everybody gains insight into our culture. The camera was ready to record and he started.
This bloke walks into a pub, down in Victoria. He's got a little, yellow dog on a leash - the ugliest little, yellow dog you've ever seen. It's just an ugly, dopey Fu**er. He walks up to the bar and says to the barman: 'I'll have a beer, thanks.' The barman says: “Hey listen mate, this is the ugliest little, yellow dog I've ever seen in my life! You wanna get him out of here? - cause big Bruce has got Fido down the end of the bar and he will tear the ass-bone right out of this little, yellow dog." The bloke says: "Aah, don't worry about him, he will be alright.” So he is drinking his beer and Fido is on a big, thick chain down on the end of the bar, and he is brrrrrr, froth at the mouth and everything. The barman says: “Mate, you gonna have to take this ugly, little, yellow dog out.” The bloke says: “Alright.” So, he takes it outside and he ties it to a poll. Up the other end of the bar, Bruce is trying to hold Fido. Fido snaps the chain and jumps straight through the glass door – smash!!! - and attacks the little, yellow dog. They hear these blood-curdle and screams - and it's over. So, the barman says to this bloke: “I told you Fido would kill this fu**ing, little, ugly, yellow dog.” The bloke says: ”Aah, I reckon he'll be alright.” So, they walk out and there's blood and guts everywhere. Just a little, yellow dog sitting there and he's got bits and pieces of Fido all over him and he is licking his chops. So, everybody is going: ”F**ck!!!, look at this shit. This little, fu**ing, ugly, yellow dog has killed Fido. Fido has never lost a fight!” So, Bruce says to this bloke: “Fido was my heart and soul and you come along with this stupid, little, ugly, yellow, fu**ing dog that killed Fido. What sort of a dog is that anyway?” The bloke said to him: “Well, before we cut his tail off and painted it yellow it used to be a crocodile.”
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